Why Treating People How They Wish to Be Treated Matters More than Ever
The age-old axiom, "Treat others as you would like to be treated," often touted as the Golden Rule, has long been hailed as the epitome of ethical conduct. But in an increasingly diverse and complex world, where our interactions are not just local but global, is this rule enough? Through my experiences as an author, a chartered accountant, and especially as a reverse mentoring specialist, I've learned that this rule is ripe for a timely update.
The Golden Rule, while a valuable starting point, is rooted in the assumption that what's good for one is good for all. It's a one-size-fits-all approach to ethics and empathy. However, as a reverse mentoring specialist, I've learned firsthand the power of individual perspectives.
The "Platinum Rule"—treat others as they wish to be treated—acknowledges these unique viewpoints.
For example, in a mentoring relationship, what works for a seasoned executive might not work for a Gen Z intern. Instead of imposing a single framework, the Platinum Rule adapts to the needs of each individual, creating a more nuanced, respectful, and effective interaction.
Enter the "Platinum Rule"—treat others how they wish to be treated.
Here are three compelling reasons why this principle trumps its golden predecessor.
1. It Fosters Authentic Empathy
The Golden Rule assumes that the treatment you desire is the treatment that others would appreciate. But that's a presumptuous approach. We all have unique tastes, preferences, and, importantly, boundaries. Authentic empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another from their point of view, not ours.
Consider the role of a mentor. As someone deeply involved in reverse mentorship, I've witnessed scenarios where established professionals try to guide younger folks in a manner they themselves prefer. The result? Disconnect, miscommunication, and missed opportunities for meaningful growth. Genuine empathy requires stepping into the other person’s world and respecting it for what it is—complex, individual, and real.
2. It's the Foundation of Inclusive Leadership
In our increasingly multicultural, multi-generational workplaces, the Platinum Rule is not a luxury; it's a necessity. Leaders need to tailor their approaches to fit the unique needs of their team members. In the realm of Marketing, for example, you wouldn't use the same communication style with a Baby Boomer as you would with a Digital Native Gen-Z. One might prefer detailed email updates, while the other may want to cut to the chase in a Slack message.
The Platinum Rule ensures that you're not merely imposing your own framework but are adapting to each individual’s communication style, career ambitions, and comfort level with technology. That’s not just good management; it’s inclusive leadership.
3. It Builds Stronger, More Effective Relationships
If you've ever been in a coaching relationship, you know that mutual respect and understanding are paramount. It's not just about providing what you think is valuable guidance. What does the mentee actually need? Maybe it's not your industry know-how but your ability to listen.
The Platinum Rule reminds us to check our assumptions at the door. By treating others how they wish to be treated, we not only show respect but also invest in a relationship that’s mutual. It's the cornerstone for building stronger, more effective relationships in all spheres of life, whether it's business, mentoring, or even personal relationships.
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While the Golden Rule provided a solid foundation for ethical interaction, it’s time to upgrade to the Platinum Rule for a new era. This isn't just a semantic change; it's a fundamental shift in how we perceive and respect the individuality of others. It enables us to engage more deeply, lead more inclusively, and build relationships that are not just transactional but transformational.
In a world increasingly interconnected yet individually nuanced, it's not just about walking a mile in someone else's shoes.
It's about understanding that their journey is different from yours, and that's perfectly okay. So, as we navigate through the complexities of global crises, interpersonal relationships, and even the ethical dimensions of travel, let's adopt the Platinum Rule as our new guiding principle. Embrace it, when you start seeing people as they truly are—each a one-of-a-kind masterpiece—you don’t just respect them; you honour the glorious tapestry of human experience. And in my book, that’s a rule worth living by.
As a recovering Type A personality, I have had to adapt significantly when leading a team to ensure that I am able to understand the style that work best to multiply the knowledge in the team as force everyone to adapt to my way of thinking.
I am interested to hear what your most distinct memory is of adapting your approach to ensure that you were more inclusive?
