We came across two essays on the same subject with the same title over the course of a week. The authors of these essays could not be more different. Dr Chakraborty is a professor of marketing at Shoolini University in the picturesque hill station of Solan in India. Ms Gonzalez is a bestselling author in America and now a staff writer for The Atlantic. Their essays shed light on a seemingly innocuous behavioural issue which captures one of the central faultlines in modern day free market democracies.
Dr Chakraborty writes,“Money has a way of causing people to clam up.
The social dynamic changes when someone has a lot of money. No longer are they able to relate to the average person on the street. They live in a different world with different problems. Money also gives people a false sense of security. They think that because they have Money, they don’t have to worry about the things that other people have to worry about. This is why rich people are so quiet.
They have everything they need and they don’t feel the need to engage with the outside world. Money has made them self-sufficient and content. There is no reason for them to make small talk or engage in idle chatter. They can just sit back and enjoy their own company without feeling the need to reach out to others.
Money has given them the ability to be quiet and content in their own little world. Money has a way of quieting people.
The rich are often quieter than the poor because they have less to worry about. Money can buy you food, shelter, and security. It can also buy you freedom from want and fear. When you have enough money, you don’t have to worry about where your next meal is coming from or whether you’ll be able to pay your rent. You can live your life without worrying about financial insecurity. Money also buys you power and influence. If you have enough money, you can make the world bend to your will.
You can buy politicians….”
As per Dr Chakraborty rich people love ‘quiet’ because:“Money gives people the ability to insulate themselves from the outside world. They can buy quieter cars, houses in gated communities, and private schools for their children. They can also afford to take vacations to quiet places. This is why rich people are so quiet – they can afford to avoid noise.”
Ms Gonzalez’s essay extends this line of thinking and make “noise” part of a class war. Her interview with NPR on this subject is very interesting. NPR begins by quoting from her piece in The Atlantic and then moves into interview mode,“”New York in the summer is a noisy place, especially if you don’t have money. The rich run off to the Hamptons or Maine. The bourgeoisie are safely shielded by the hum of their central air. But for the broke, summer means an open window through which the clatter of the city becomes the soundtrack to life – motorcycles revving, buses braking and music – ceaseless music.”
But she says that her native Brooklyn is being silenced and not by choice. Gentrification is to blame. In her essay titled “Why Do Rich People Love Quiet?” she argues that the neighborhoods like the one she grew up in are being taken over by demands for quiet, and it has a lot to do with class and a sense of entitlement. When we spoke, she told me she noticed this when she left home to head to Brown University.
XOCHITL GONZALEZ: You’re suddenly cohabitating with a bunch of people who had grown up in this culture of, like, you need concentration to be quiet. You know, music is a distraction. This is a distraction. That’s a distraction. So the idea of protecting and preserving quiet on the campus because we’re all meant to be there thinking just didn’t seem to vibe with what I knew. And also, a lot of the time when people would sort of ask for quiet, it was just, you know, two or three friends over, you know, to your room because you’re sharing space with new people. And your room is your living space. And suddenly laughing became sort of a distracting noise or, you know, like, how do I talk more quietly?
And so I think it started to feel like – living felt like a joyous thing, and at least a loud thing. But that wasn’t quite welcome because it seemed to get in the way of what we were told we were meant to be doing there, which, you know, was sort of the silence of academic departments and sort of the hushed quiet of waiting for your professor and leafing through things in the stacks of the library. And I understood that that was for those spaces. But it was when it spilled into living space that it sort of started to feel like one aesthetic and preference was dominating another.”
Ms Gonzalez then ups the ante and says that people in authority enforcing silence is an act of entitlement on the part of the privileged:“It’s the sense of entitlement, and it’s the sense that – the assumption that because there’s a temporary discomfort for that person, that multiple people’s, like, life at that moment should change for them. This idea of either being unwilling completely to moderate yourself or being unwilling to speak to people as human beings and equals…”
It would have been nice if these authors were around in our teenage years when our parents were shouting at us to turn down the radio, shut the door and concentrate on our studies. Anyway, we now have teenage kids of our own to worry about and there is no point telling them to be quiet in a world with endlessly streamed free music, podcasts and low cost videocalls.
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FAQs
As per Dr Chakraborty rich people love 'quiet' because: “Money gives people the ability to insulate themselves from the outside world. They can buy quieter cars, houses in gated communities, and private schools for their children. They can also afford to take vacations to quiet places.
Why do rich people struggle in relationships? ›
Another study found that rich people may be less successful in love because they are less likely than poorer people to exhibit flexibility and empathy in relationships. When it comes to a divorce, this lack of flexibility is often played out in the settlement battle, making the split painful, long and stressful.
What is quiet wealth? ›
Quiet wealth, or stealth wealth, is the art of living a financially comfortable life while keeping a low financial profile. It involves adopting a more modest, carefully curated lifestyle and avoiding conspicuous displays of wealth.
Is being rich isolating? ›
According to therapists that CNBC spoke to, more often than not, the super-rich struggle with feelings of isolation, depression, and paranoia, amongst others — a spectrum of emotions that many others tend to share.
Do rich people have a hard time making friends? ›
Social Isolation
The lifestyle of the rich and famous can be isolating. The constant scrutiny, media attention, and the difficulty of finding individuals who can relate to their experiences can lead to social isolation. This isolation can make it challenging to form genuine friendships.
What is the syndrome of being rich? ›
Sudden Wealth Syndrome (SDS) refers to a psychological condition or an identity crisis in individuals who have become suddenly wealthy. Sudden Wealth Syndrome is characterized by isolation from former friends, guilt over their change in circ*mstances, and extreme fear of losing their money.
Why do people become arrogant when they get rich? ›
This is a kind of emotional out of control. Because one suddenly gets unexpected wealth, which is higher than one's expected life goals, one becomes extremely happy and the mind loses its wit. But what comes easily goes easily. There is nothing wrong with wealth itself.
How do you spot a wealthy person? ›
- Minimalist Homes: Where Less Is More. ...
- Low Profile Luxury Cars: Driving Discretion. ...
- High-quality Wardrobes with Minimal Brand Identification: Style with Substance. ...
- Real Generational Wealth: Steadfast Stability. ...
- Subtle Signs of Real Estate Investment: Property Portfolio. ...
- Pearliness of Their Whites: A Smile of Affluence.
Rich people don't show off. They don't regularly wear branded clothes or show off their luxurious items. They don't feel the NEED to show off at all and that is what separates them from the rest of the people who are trying to show off their skills.
What is lazy wealth? ›
The term lazy money refers to funds you've earmarked for retirement that are not actively working to generate returns. One of the most common examples of lazy money is cash that's sitting in a low-interest savings account, earning minimal interest.
Once you have $1 million in assets, you can look seriously at living entirely off the returns of a portfolio. After all, the S&P 500 alone averages 10% returns per year. Setting aside taxes and down-year investment portfolio management, a $1 million index fund could provide $100,000 annually.
How do you know if you are rich or poor? ›
Being rich currently means having a net worth of about $2.2 million. However, this number fluctuates over time, and you can measure wealth according to your financial priorities. As a result, healthy financial habits, like spending less than you make, are critical to becoming wealthy, no matter your definition.
Are rich people self-made? ›
Only 27% of multimillionaires are self-made, according to a study by Bank of America Private Bank. Most multimillionaires get assistance in the form of an inheritance, an affluent upbringing, or both. Building wealth on your own is a slow, steady process, but you can do it if you invest consistently.
Is it better to be rich with no friends or poor with many friends? ›
The answer really depends on individual preferences and values. Some people might prioritize financial stability and the opportunities it brings, while others might value the support and companionship of friends above material wealth. Ultimately, it's about what brings the most fulfillment and happiness to each person.
How to socialize with the wealthy? ›
Compliment their good work. Appreciate their gestures. Give gifts to them by getting them the things they need and value. It is not about the cost of the item as much as it is about the thoughtfulness of the act.
Why are rich people sometimes still unhappy? ›
The Isolation of Success
The demands of a busy career or the fear of being taken advantage of can isolate some wealthy individuals, leading to loneliness and strained relationships.
How does wealth affect relationships? ›
Key points. Financial prosperity does not necessarily equal emotional prosperity. Great wealth can distract from interpersonal intimacy. The uber-wealthy unintentionally find themselves emotionally and literally isolated.
Is it hard for rich people to find love? ›
Wealth can indeed attract a myriad of suitors, but the challenge lies in discerning authenticity. Everyone deserves to find that special someone who sees beyond the bank balance. With patience, self-awareness and a bit of strategy, love is not just a lucrative investment, but a priceless one. Mark Travers, Ph.
Does money cause problems in a relationship? ›
Numerous surveys and studies over the years have found that money is a primary source of conflict in marriages, and it can lead to divorce. For example, a 2022 survey on stress in the U.S. found that about 41% of Americans with families said money was a big source of tension in their households.
Are rich people more prone to cheating? ›
Yes, successful people are more prone to cheating on their spouses. For good measure, a lot of these studies conclude successful people's propensity not only for cheating on their romantic partners but also for engaging in unethical practices in both their professional and personal lives.
